yes

Rain, starting

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

i don't really want to be associated with that one for some reason

its performative

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

so at the end

you cannot feed someone truth

as in

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things

It Will Get Lighter

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

so the method has to be autonomous

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

i have read not even 1 book

autonomy of learning

i hope ai fixes this with the cessation of interfaces and walls

lol

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

hiding from the rain

barren land

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.