13, H, grate



Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46



Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59

It Will Get Lighter

Style


Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

its performative

As I'm trying to tell my Korean colleague / fresh meat that this is abnormal, that most people in England aren't like this, the host of the party emerges from the bathroom to a roar of laughter and applause. He's a fat middle aged Frenchman and he's changed into traditional Indian dress and a turban. He looks fucking ridiculous. I try to back away, to avoid the inevitable photo of me in this moment that will one day appear to ruin my life, but everyone is crowding around, trapping me in the middle of it.

yeah

As we're stood there I notice a middle-aged woman staring at us across the room. I'm trying to catch her gaze, but its kind of vacant. I guess she sees me looking and considers it to be an invitation. She floats over to us in this strange dazed way, and on the approach I realise she's staring at (through?) my Korean colleague / fresh meat. She's saying wow, wow, wow. She seems genuinely so delighted, so shocked, so elated.

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

It Will Get Lighter

i have read not even 1 book

really i want the internet

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

The slug lives in my bathroom. I only see it in the early hours of the morning, when I'm not quite right.

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me