Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

hello reader,

And thank you for telling me that the manner in which the narrator consistently fails to act morally is really compelling. Fuck you.

As we're stood there I notice a middle-aged woman staring at us across the room. I'm trying to catch her gaze, but its kind of vacant. I guess she sees me looking and considers it to be an invitation. She floats over to us in this strange dazed way, and on the approach I realise she's staring at (through?) my Korean colleague / fresh meat. She's saying wow, wow, wow. She seems genuinely so delighted, so shocked, so elated.

I'm getting bored and he can tell, so he shifts the topic towards me. He tells me he'd spotted me chatting to a girl earlier, a black girl, and asks what I thought of her, if I liked her. I mimed affirmatively.

As I'm trying to tell my Korean colleague / fresh meat that this is abnormal, that most people in England aren't like this, the host of the party emerges from the bathroom to a roar of laughter and applause. He's a fat middle aged Frenchman and he's changed into traditional Indian dress and a turban. He looks fucking ridiculous. I try to back away, to avoid the inevitable photo of me in this moment that will one day appear to ruin my life, but everyone is crowding around, trapping me in the middle of it.

Maybe, Jack, I'm doing this because I'm English?

ahnaf abrar

i did until you asked which kind of gave it away

what do you think my name is

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

i was tempted to lie about my name

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

and the fake qualifier

like first name

i love to walk around and see things and take photos and go online and look at websites and click on links and take screenshots i love to surf and i love to browse

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

like magnets

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

yes

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.