I'm sat out the front of a cafe in Hatton Garden. I've just eaten a brie and bacon panini, and I'm rolling a cigarette. Feeling very London. An old man comes up to me and asks for a roll-up. I oblige.

Style

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

13, H, grate

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

it is hopeful

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

It Will Get Lighter

Today I felt like starting

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting


1

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

idk

really i want the internet

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

i have read not even 1 book

and the fake qualifier

like first name