no like which do people call me

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

Rain, starting

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

Worse Lift

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

all that is to say

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

i see a website

1

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

i am quite illiterate on producing technology

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

i hope ai fixes this with the cessation of interfaces and walls

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

division of reality is straying away from it

not their contents

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me