hiding from the rain

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die. 

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I am below everything.

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

Better Lift

Worse Lift

This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.

so magnetisation means the divine spirit acting thru u endowing you with its qualities

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

its good

its good

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

no i haven't really read anything

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

i really havent

i don't really want to be associated with that one for some reason

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

fw

currently

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

isaac newton

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.