i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

but i respect your search

i hope ai fixes this with the cessation of interfaces and walls

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

we need to be deconstructing our identities

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

all that is to say

"Put a blanket."

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

Lift Analysis

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

i haven't read 100 book s so i'm probably not getting the depth of all of what you're saying

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

---

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life