ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

but i respect your search

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

autonomy of learning

amazing hopefully this was all legible and frankly i might be going very off board but you seemed interesting

ahnaf abrar

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

god being the centre magnet

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

But seriously, thank you, Jack

we can only engage in such a way

as in

December 2025

The slug lives in my bathroom. I only see it in the early hours of the morning, when I'm not quite right.

Overall meaning: The dream seems to explore vulnerability, unspoken emotion, and the tension between connection and isolation. It suggests you may be processing intense feelings of longing or missed opportunities, and your subconscious is guiding you to acknowledge, release, or transform them.


i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.