yeah

no longer writing in the third person

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

but i respect your search

Today I felt like starting

you have a beautiful account btw

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

ahnaf abrar

so i or you can author smaller fragments that get arranged

its good short few pages

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

autonomy of learning

"Put a blanket."

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

sorry i am texting like a slav

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.