you know who you are. no more time, not like

1

. way too specific.

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

IWGD

no longer writing in the third person

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Today I felt like starting

it is hopeful

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Picture

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

god "possessing" artists "possessing" people

autonomy of learning

not their contents

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

its performative