Hours staring at the ceiling, the wall, curling up into a ball. It seems annoyed with the light, it kind of recoils. It will get lighter. I wonder where it goes in the day.

Thank you, Jack

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

13, H, grate

        13       |
                |
                |
            H   |
                |
                |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
                |

no longer writing in the third person

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

IWGD

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

Better Lift

its performative

It's

dusk

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

its good

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

It Will Get Lighter

its good

i dont understand magnetisation

all that is to say

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

sorry i am texting like a slav

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

i love it here

stalgivc is the greatest poster of all time

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

and the fake qualifier

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46