yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

really i want the internet

i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

we want to live the knowledge too live the content

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

autonomy of learning

Today I felt like starting

it is hopeful

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

Lift Analysis

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

its performative

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

FOUNDING DOCUMENT

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

Can I see

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

i really havent