December 2025
i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything
mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation
in a post. I want to be remembered
like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them
all that is to say
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models
it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful
ahnaf is it worth reading all those books
and the fake qualifier
As we're stood there I notice a middle-aged woman staring at us across the room. I'm trying to catch her gaze, but its kind of vacant. I guess she sees me looking and considers it to be an invitation. She floats over to us in this strange dazed way, and on the approach I realise she's staring at (through?) my Korean colleague / fresh meat. She's saying wow, wow, wow. She seems genuinely so delighted, so shocked, so elated.
After I get away from the old racist failed actor, I go to see my Korean colleague. He's just arrived in London and I want to see how he's handling the party. We'd been invited as fresh meat for some of the older, gayer attendees. We aren't aware of that.
I'm getting bored and he can tell, so he shifts the topic towards me. He tells me he'd spotted me chatting to a girl earlier, a black girl, and asks what I thought of her, if I liked her. I mimed affirmatively.