no longer writing in the third person

13, H, grate


it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

yeah

like first name

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

the only things i have read are just excerpts and 1 dialogue by plato fully and mcluhan's medium is the massage but it cannot be considered a book


I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

i don't really want to be associated with that one for some reason

hiding from the rain

is this you as well

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

isaac

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

Today I felt like starting

propensity within someone

as in

we need to be deconstructing our identities

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

isaac newton

ion