a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

its good

Worse Lift

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

it is hopeful

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

currently

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

"Put a blanket."

13, H, grate

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"