Worse Lift

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

no longer writing in the third person

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08

Windrush Art Kid Oligarch

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

I am below everything.

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

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the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

its performative

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

so the method has to be autonomous

lol