but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

all that is to say

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

as in

i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

division of reality is straying away from it

There is a pretty persistent ambient hate in England, a lot of people say vile shit about Muslims or immigrants or whatever, but in my experience most people aren't actual white supremacists. They have a black friend who they get a beer with. One of the good ones. Etc.

you have a beautiful account btw

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

brb i will read and reply sincerely

Can I see

yes

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

Better Lift

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you

kind of mythopoesis

autonomy of learning

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

1

i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

i am quite illiterate on producing technology