She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.
I created this site
.
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03
This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.
no longer writing in the third person
ahnaf is it worth reading all those books
fw
so at the end
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting
its performative
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.i guess imagine a multimedia obsidian or notion that behaves according to some insane arcane rules that you can't ever really determine
you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak
much more tactility