the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak
It's
dusk
in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.i guess imagine a multimedia obsidian or notion that behaves according to some insane arcane rules that you can't ever really determine
this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet
lol
plato
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
brb i will read and reply sincerely
amazing hopefully this was all legible and frankly i might be going very off board but you seemed interesting
I catch him on his way to the bar, telling him about this old racist failed actor that I'm avoiding. That I'm failing to confront. I get the sense he's avoiding people too. We get our drinks and find a corner. We chat for a bit. He's managing just fine.
which magnetises chains of pins
My inability to confront the old racist failed actor is distracting me. I decide not to tell her about it.
hiding from the rain
i am quite illiterate on producing technology
i was tempted to lie about my name
really i want the internet
As we're stood there I notice a middle-aged woman staring at us across the room. I'm trying to catch her gaze, but its kind of vacant. I guess she sees me looking and considers it to be an invitation. She floats over to us in this strange dazed way, and on the approach I realise she's staring at (through?) my Korean colleague / fresh meat. She's saying wow, wow, wow. She seems genuinely so delighted, so shocked, so elated.
Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49
i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things
A procession forms behind the French Raj and his fireworks bearer as they head out the door. I've lost my Korean colleague / fresh meat in the chaos. I'm sure he'll be able to fend for himself. They have mandatory military service in Korea.
Her English is poor but she manages a brief introduction before getting to the point. She asks if she can touch his face. She's already reaching out and gesturing at it. Koreans are way too polite, he's just laughing awkwardly. I put my hand kind of between them and wave it to try and indicate no to her. I'm still in fucking mime mode. I say no, but it's not really to her, or to him, just no, in general. This is all too weird. Dejected, she departs with a comment about having never seen someone like him before.
there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.
god "possessing" artists "possessing" people
you cannot feed someone truth