i really havent

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

Picture

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Rain, starting

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

hiding from the rain

i am quite illiterate on producing technology

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

Better Lift

its performative

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

As we're stood there I notice a middle-aged woman staring at us across the room. I'm trying to catch her gaze, but its kind of vacant. I guess she sees me looking and considers it to be an invitation. She floats over to us in this strange dazed way, and on the approach I realise she's staring at (through?) my Korean colleague / fresh meat. She's saying wow, wow, wow. She seems genuinely so delighted, so shocked, so elated.

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fw

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50