Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

really i want the internet

i see a website

fw

so an active mazelike process

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

as in

you cannot feed someone truth

magnetisation/form

i haven't read 100 book s so i'm probably not getting the depth of all of what you're saying

so the method has to be autonomous

lol

not their contents

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

yeah

what do you mean

Mon, 01 Dec 2025 23:38:15

I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank.

autonomy of learning

We stand there laughing. The fireworks go off behind him.

we need to be deconstructing our identities

They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.