it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful
that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
no longer writing in the third person
After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting
Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.
Better Lift
i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me
One of the birds shoots out of the tree.
i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike
The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.
but really the thing should be autonomous
the textwall is as much for me as it is for you
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03
"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."