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It Will Get Lighter

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

you know who you are. no more time, not like

1

. way too specific.

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

1

brb i will read and reply sincerely

Style

its good short few pages

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

i was tempted to lie about my name

what do you think my name is

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

idk

magnetises a pin

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

i have read not even 1 book

the site i am dreaming

i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it

like first name

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

i did until you asked which kind of gave it away

we need to be deconstructing our identities