Mon, 01 Dec 2025 23:38:15
it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
something religious, a kind of complex,
it will get lighter
, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.kind of mythopoesis
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.
One of the birds shoots out of the tree.
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.We stand there laughing. The fireworks go off behind him.
Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?
They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.
There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.