okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

As we're stood there I notice a middle-aged woman staring at us across the room. I'm trying to catch her gaze, but its kind of vacant. I guess she sees me looking and considers it to be an invitation. She floats over to us in this strange dazed way, and on the approach I realise she's staring at (through?) my Korean colleague / fresh meat. She's saying wow, wow, wow. She seems genuinely so delighted, so shocked, so elated.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

i love to walk around and see things and take photos and go online and look at websites and click on links and take screenshots i love to surf and i love to browse

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

i am quite confused, not quite getting the idea of it

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

we can only engage in such a way

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

I am below everything.

theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

but i respect your search

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

13, H, grate

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

all that is to say

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

the textwall is as much for me as it is for you