...
no longer writing in the third person
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.I am below everything.
something religious, a kind of complex,
it will get lighter
, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13
I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting
Today I felt like starting
Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49
I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.
I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.
currently
i see a website
Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03