Today I felt like starting
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
Better Lift
It's
dusk
in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"
something religious, a kind of complex,
it will get lighter
, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc."Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
a heavy, heavy rain. a clear day.
I created this site
.Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."
This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?
Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.
We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.
it is hopeful
there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.