It Will Get Lighter

or never left

The old failed actor genuinely believed this girl was of a lesser race. He believed she shouldn't be talking with me, shouldn't be here at this party, shouldn't be here in this country. He wanted a white England. I didn't really challenge him on it. Sometimes I justify it with thoughts like I was drunk, or baffled, or it isn't an argument I'll win, or he can't hear me anyway, or whatever. I didn't argue with him. I just cut off his rant and left with a pathetic "In a bit."

December 2025

It Will Get Lighter

way too random but already engaging. i want to explore it

send link

its good short few pages

I imagine that some lab-grown 29-year-old from Woking with a mind honed to identify individuals who fit the profile of Real Londoner (as conceived of by 50 opinion-polled racist builders and their wives in the Midlands) picks a stubborn local who can still somehow afford to live here and passes him along to some creative studio.

A roll of 50s is one of the items he dumps onto my table during the search. Of course it is. He asks if I'm a delivery boy or a setter or this or that diamond related job. I keep saying no, I'm enjoying hearing all of these new words. Eventually I tell him that I work in film, which is kind of true. He asks where I'm filming. I'm not filming. He tells me that I can't be that good at it then. He then tells me that he made a film once, in the 80s. It was called Pimlico Rats.

plato

its good

thank you

Pimlico Rats

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

so magnetisation means the divine spirit acting thru u endowing you with its qualities

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

i see a website

13, H, grate

yeah

After I get away from the old racist failed actor, I go to see my Korean colleague. He's just arrived in London and I want to see how he's handling the party. We'd been invited as fresh meat for some of the older, gayer attendees. We aren't aware of that.

the site i am dreaming

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then