but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

Rain, starting

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

no longer writing in the third person

1

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

you have a beautiful account btw

IWGD

I am below everything.

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

i love to walk around and see things and take photos and go online and look at websites and click on links and take screenshots i love to surf and i love to browse

Style

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class

plato

Can I see

all that is to say

isaac newton

okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models

i want to do that too

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak