There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.
Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03
After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting
lol yea
autonomy of learning
Today I felt like starting
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so at the end
there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.
i want to do that too
all that is to say
i hope ai fixes this with the cessation of interfaces and walls
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
we need to be deconstructing our identities
in a post. I want to be remembered
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
barren land
and the fake qualifier
that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.
i was tempted to lie about my name
was it worth it
division of reality is straying away from it
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate
this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet