mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
in a post. I want to be remembered
no longer writing in the third person
It's
dusk
in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.hiding from the rain
much more tactility
as in
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now
this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.