I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

so an active mazelike process

magnetises a pin

its performative

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

not their contents

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

its good short few pages

no i haven't really read anything

whats your name?

sorry i am texting like a slav

"Put a blanket."

okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models

its good

we can only engage in such a way

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

plato

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

so at the end