nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class

...

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models

autonomy of learning

idk

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

...

we want to live the knowledge too live the content

like first name

The slug lives in my bathroom. I only see it in the early hours of the morning, when I'm not quite right.

1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

i was tempted to lie about my name

December 2025

It Will Get Lighter

bro i read nothing in my life

We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.

i really havent

I Write Goodbye Letter

was it worth it

or never left

and the fake qualifier

We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate