the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

is everyoneback on tumblr now

abrar?

i guess imagine a multimedia obsidian or notion that behaves according to some insane arcane rules that you can't ever really determine

bro i read nothing in my life

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

December 2025

bro i read nothing in my life

Hours staring at the ceiling, the wall, curling up into a ball. It seems annoyed with the light, it kind of recoils. It will get lighter. I wonder where it goes in the day.

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

propensity within someone

nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class

Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after

dusk

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

lol yea

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.