like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

kind of mythopoesis

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

Picture

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

you have a beautiful account btw

so i or you can author smaller fragments that get arranged

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

as in

i guess imagine a multimedia obsidian or notion that behaves according to some insane arcane rules that you can't ever really determine

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

lol yea

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever