Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

IWGD

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Lift Analysis

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

Hours staring at the ceiling, the wall, curling up into a ball. It seems annoyed with the light, it kind of recoils. It will get lighter. I wonder where it goes in the day.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

I Write Goodbye Letter

i really havent

wait what is that


magnetisation/form

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation


Style

and the fake qualifier

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.