I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

Today I felt like starting

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

Lift Analysis

December 2025

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

you cannot feed someone truth

lol yea

is everyoneback on tumblr now

barren land