ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

you have a beautiful account btw

no longer writing in the third person

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike

kind of mythopoesis

wow, you are the first stranger to write a textwall to me

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

it is hopeful

i sat down to eat my peasant dinner but i thought it was a song you sent so i didn’t watch it then

I Write Goodbye Letter

way too random but already engaging. i want to explore it

This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

was it worth it

send link

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

wait what is that

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.