the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

in a post. I want to be remembered

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

Picture

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

1

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

...

its good short few pages

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

bro i read nothing in my life

Better Lift

you cannot feed someone truth

It Will Get Lighter

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos