a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext

Can I see

It Will Get Lighter

FOUNDING DOCUMENT

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

all that is to say

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46


hiding from the rain

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them


something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

brb i will read and reply sincerely

13, H, grate

        13       |
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            H   |
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. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
                |

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos


it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

really i want the internet

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

propensity within someone