it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful
no longer writing in the third person
Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.
Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17
The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.
i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike
in a post. I want to be remembered
Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?
Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
really i want the internet
that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.
but i respect your search
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50
i see a website
kind of mythopoesis
Better Lift
a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it