like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

hiding from the rain

"Put a blanket."

no longer writing in the third person

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

It Will Get Lighter

        13       |
                |
                |
            H   |
                |
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. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
                |

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue

you know who you are. no more time, not like

1

Hours staring at the ceiling, the wall, curling up into a ball. It seems annoyed with the light, it kind of recoils. It will get lighter. I wonder where it goes in the day.

send link

i really havent

i want to do that too

okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models

was it worth it

nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry class

currently