we need to be deconstructing our identities
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out."No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 23:49:08
I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 21:22:59
One of the birds shoots out of the tree.
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.
It's
dusk
in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.Better Lift
This is a website run by a narcissist who can't produce anything without the hope that it is seen and loved but can't act due to the fear of it being seen and hated. They immediately feel the need to ask Jack GPT to define whatever this feeling is in the hope that understanding it will mean control over it and control over it will mean that they can stop it.
hiding from the rain
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
somewhere between instagram and chatgpt
there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.
this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet
to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now