Picture
I'm in a crowded
lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me. The lift won't
stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
1
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and
impulsively.
how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the
excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise
this is going to be awful.
I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13
It Will Get Lighter
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just
their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them
in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's
using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their
voices are betraying them.
-
Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling
trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations,
relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of
others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
-
Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could
symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect
unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
-
Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the
subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing.
Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk
points to transition or uncertainty.
-
The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and
guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable,
suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons
that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left
unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
-
Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death;
it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control.
It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.
"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"
no longer writing in the third person
yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf
Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41
nope. i only remember the leaves bristling behind the window during chemistry
class
Mon, 01 Dec 2025 23:38:15
