its performative
I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.
I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.
there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.
i don't really want to be associated with that one for some reason
Sun, 02 Nov 2025 22:11:24
abrar?
mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate
Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.it is hopeful
and the fake qualifier
Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49
ahnaf abrar
yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf
what do you think my name is
"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"
We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.
i see a website
or never left
i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things
Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03