theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

its good

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

        13       |
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            H   |
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. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
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...

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

Slug

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

wait what is that

December 2025

in a post. I want to be remembered

The slug lives in my bathroom. I only see it in the early hours of the morning, when I'm not quite right.

⚠️ Live Document Forever ⚠️

Hours staring at the ceiling, the wall, curling up into a ball. It seems annoyed with the light, it kind of recoils. It will get lighter. I wonder where it goes in the day.

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

or never left

Picture

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

Today I felt like starting

fw

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

"Put a blanket."

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

13, H, grate

way too random but already engaging. i want to explore it

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.