"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

Rain, starting

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

...

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.


I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Windrush Art Kid Oligarch

i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate


a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

i hadn't considered this pedagogically or as a kind of personal knowledge management system (puke) at all but i suppose it is both of those things

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

Can I see

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

i was tempted to lie about my name

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

god being the centre magnet

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

like first name

autonomy of learning

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

what do you think my name is

Today I felt like starting