Maybe, Jack, I'm doing this because I'm English?

Rain, starting

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

We gather around the start of a causeway down to the Thames. It's a pretty cold night and there's a breeze coming off the river.

We look out over the river to a block of luxury flats built on the site of some old docks. It would be nice to live right there. Yes.

Dreams like these are highly symbolic and emotionally intense. Here’s a breakdown of common interpretations:

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

hello reader,

you know who you are. no more time, not like

1

. way too specific.

we need to be deconstructing our identities

They're fucking around with the box. I ask her what people do with fireworks for so long before they're ready to light. She doesn't know.

I am below everything.

which magnetises chains of pins

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

        13       |
                |
                |
            H   |
                |
                |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
. . . .         |
                |

idk

  1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
  2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
  3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
  4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
  5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.
i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate

was it worth it