Thank you for telling me that I'm failing to see how I'm reproducing the dynamics I'm trying to critique by only describing my Korean colleague / fresh meat and the black girl in relation to others and myself.

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Imprint, memory, impact, representation, impression

I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.

Style

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

Better Lift

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

okay this is interesting because pedagogies we have rn are not proper models

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

what do you mean

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

which magnetises chains of pins

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

something religious, a kind of complex,

it will get lighter

, something washing, cleansing, revealing, etc.

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

idk

It's

dusk

in a snowy forest and I'm playing with a fox.
It bites my wrist but there is only a dull ache.
I feel that it wants to say sorry but can't. I die.

really i want the internet

...