yes

it is hopeful

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

in a way what we are really interested in with pedagogy is the magnetisation

theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

hiding from the rain

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Better Lift

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

Lift Analysis

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

i see a website

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:27:13

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

no longer writing in the third person

we can only engage in such a way